ponder press – Page 13 – custom keycaps, jewelry and crafts handmade in Seattle

Will I ever learn?

Hand stamped, colored and resined beaded bezel

We’re a month (five weeks) into the market season, and today was only my third day there.

Two weeks ago it was so very rainy, and in a market first, I called to cancel the day of. The forecast was for 90% chance of rain, and it was really coming down on my drive in. I was filled with equal measures and and guilt as the thought of cancelling.

Bird bezel embellished with paint, glitter, flowers and resin.

I did feel some guilt for cancelling, but the rest of the day felt like a snow day. You know, I had plans for something else, and then my day opened wide up. Morgan made a fire, and I crocheted and added items to my etsy store. (Which led to sales, so it’s not like I had to swallow the cancellation fee.)

Last Saturday the forecast was for rain again, and I studied the hour-by-hour forecast as if my life depended on it. I decided to go, even though my normal neighbors wouldn’t be there. I was cold and miserable for much of the day, but sales-wise, it was the best Memorial Day weekend in three years.

Even so, sales were slow in the morning, and I dislike the negative self talk that starts up when people pass my jewelry by. I know it’s not for everyone. I know people not judging me. And, I know that my self worth is something more than the $35 booth fee. Never mind that there’s a huge sense of relief upon making that amount for the day.

It’s one thing to know these truths. It’s quite another to internalize them.

The funny thing is that despite today’s sunny weather, sales were kind of slow. It really is a crap shoot.

All of that said, this morning an adequate song was on the radio when I pulled into the lot. It was the best I could find. Last week it was the Beatles’ “Let it Be.” There was a message there for me. And, it’s no secret that the song playing in the radio when I pull in will determine the day I have. It has to be the radio; it can’t be something I choose. Yup, see the previous post about he having weird ideas.

I have a lot of weird ideas

Let me explain. I have long held onto the idea that the right tool will transform me somehow. For example, I have a pretty horrible southpaw scrawl. I’ve long fancied that the right pen will give me good penmanship. That is sadly not so.

Also, I’ve long hoped that the right cookbook will turn me into … not a good cook, per se, but someone who likes to cook. That is sadly untrue as well. I mean I will always love to bake. And, I like looking at some food photos, but time spent in the kitchen should be to rinse paint brushes or wash my hands after using glue or resin or some other crafty medium. Time spent on food prep, especially if it’s just for me, feels like wasted time.

That said, I recently bought a shirt in Chicago that is fun and billowy and reminds me a lot of how some artsy women dress. (Is it impossible to be creative when you’re restricted by tight clothing? Really, billowy clothing is a common sight among women at the art retreats and other classes I’ve attended.)

I’ve been thinking about that shirt a lot. I’ve yet to wear it, and I wonder how it will make me feel — if it will make me feel anything. Will I feel like an artist if I dress like one? Or is my non-work uniform of jeans or cords and a t-shirt and cardigan enough of artistic garb for me? I don’t have many pairs of jeans without a resin spot here or there. And I’m OK with that. They are washing-machine resistant bits of proof that I do make things in my spare time.

Is there even such a thing as looking like an artist? And, why would I care what people think about how I look?

Sure I want to look presentable at the market and other shows, but do I want people to see me and think artist? Is there even a way to make that happen? Other jewelry makes tend to dress up. What is that message? “I’m living large. You can too, if you buy my jewelry.”

It was moustache day at the market. Because I had a tentacle mustache already, it seemed only right that I make a t-shirt of an octopus with a ‘stache.

That seems to make sense. My style is a little more casual. I’m hesitant to say funky. But that’s my ideal customer. She’s not afraid to wear something a little kooky, something very different.

And, I shouldn’t be either. Whether it’s resin marred jeans, a favorite Threadless t-shirt, or my new, flowy “artist” shirt, I just need to be me. It’s really all I can be.

With my Godzilla t-shirt on, how can I be anything but myself.

Time and travel

The last two weeks have been spent away from home. The travel and company have been good, but I’m feeling that pre-market stress and worry. Nevermind the itch to keep making things, and I’ve yet to find the ideal beading project for travel.

That said, before the most recent trip I broke out some simple mosaic squares I stamped on last fall. I thought it might be fun to experiment with them as focal points for a bead embroidery project.

Morgan commented on how he didn’t like the color of the tiles. I wanted to tell him to make his own. Then, I broke out my pens, markers and pencils and came up with these. See, I can take criticism, I just have to let it simmer.

The next step is to seal them with resin, and then I can start beading. Yay!!!

Making steps toward the market

How did I go from being swept up in a month-long beading challenge to taking a month away from blog posts?
Silly question. The answer involves a double-birthday weekend, a business trip, planning for the market and then some.
In that time I also discovered a bead artist who I just adore. My longing to do bead embroidery led me to books by Jamie Cloud Eakin. Her pieces were a huge inspiration for me, and led me to create most of what I’m showing off today.

Because I love this stamped image, of course I love this piece.

This fused glass piece was dichroic gone wrong. However, I’m OK with the overall results now that it’s been embellished.

This wonky fused glass piece is so much better now that it’s been incorporated to something more. I love the colors and the polka dots.

These two pieces make me smile. I put rose dried rose petals in resin. I’d save a few rose buds from the bouquet the vet’s office sent after Slinky died. I’d been wanting to do something with them, and this seemed right.
I have a few more resin-rose petal pieces in the works, but these are a good start.

I’ll have to do another post about putting fresh flowers in resin. And about the heat patina (not Wheatena, Morgan!) class I took last week. And there’s the Sizzix/bead embroidery project to reveal soon.

Plus, I feel like these are enough images for today. There’s not a one of these I don’t like. And, having several pieces of substance ready makes me feel like no matter what, I’ll be able to face the first day of the market head on.

Speaking of the market, I ran into Krista Jefferson of Wild and Whimsical today at the art museum. It’s good to be out and about and see someone you know!

Saying goodbye to my yarn love fest

Here it is Day 15 of Fusion Bead’s Bead Challenge, and I have to admit that I got derailed late last week.
First, when it came to making something with right-angle weave (RAW) for Thursday, I started out with seed beads and really disliked the results. I made about four or five “squares” and was ready to hurl the piece across the room.

Impatient with myself? ~~Never!~~ Always! However, not wanting to admit defeat, I decided to try a RAW bracelet with bi-cone crystals. What do you know, it looked much better. Plus, who doesn’t love a good excuse to buy more/play with crystals. But, I didn’t have enough of the colors I bought. So, I went through my stash, found some cohesive colors and started again—simply picking up colors in a random pattern. I didn’t care for that either. Last night (four days after the original challenge) I started the bracelet for the 4th time and think I’ve finally got the right colors and the right (pseudo) pattern.

Yay! It might just be a b-day gift for my mom.

Here’s last Wednesday’s project.

I did the peyote stitch around a channel bracelet. I was covering up a resin image on the bracelet, so the beadwork doesn’t fit 100% like I wanted it to. Regardless, I love the color and the slight shimmer it has.

Friday’s challenge was to make a piece from which you find inspiration from the clasp. I had some OK ideas and a lot of motivation, but still, the most I accomplished was rubbing down both toggle clasps with Gilder’s Paste. At least they’ll be ready when inspiration strikes.

Saturday we were to invite friends over for a beading gathering. Nope. Wasn’t going to happen, so I turned to Sunday’s challenge. The instructions were to try a new bead weaving technique. Playing fast and loose with my interpretation of the challenges, I made a peyote stitch bezel for a Swarovski rivoli bead. I admit it, I do like it.

Inspired by the ease of that, I moved on to creating a peyote stitch bezel for a piece of glass I fused a few weeks ago. I quite like this, too.

Having previously made a RAW bezel for a cabachon, I’m not sure why anyone would chose that over the peyote stitch. However, different strokes, etc., etc.

I also found instructions online for a square stitch bezel. That really sounds like something I’d like to make. But how will it work with a rectangular, not round, cabachon?

At some point this weekend I began to wonder if the challenges were starting to distract me from things that I really needed to do. I can honestly say that they have pulled me out of the yarn love fest I was having, which is good. But I also know that I really need to get ready for the market. It’s only seven weeks away, and there’s much to do between then and now. So, from here on out, I’m going to see how I can apply each challenge to tasks that need to be completed. One day next week, I think, we’re to fix something that’s broken. Geez, I have a whole envelope full of such pieces.

Oh, and I was hit by craft “lightning” last week. Stay tuned for photos and details.

Plus, Morgan will be hitting the slopes with his brothers this weekend. That leaves me with two full days for mini mosaics, breaking out the cricut and so much more. Not that I won’t miss him dearly, but here’s to a couple of good play days!